Anxious [Mod // Open]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]The sudden snag of his chin caused Felis to look upwards, and at Xavier's next words, Felis found himself stumped into silence. Even when Xavier moved his hand away, Felis continued to stare. He worried about him? Wait why... He... he knew they were friends especially after that drama with the local basement dwellers, but.... And... he cared. As Xavier went on to speak, something in Felis learned something knew. Rosa knew. She... she knew. For everything he'd tried to say, for everything he lied about in order to keep that smile on her face and that hope in her eyes, Rosa knew damn well what had happened. It was a shock, and Felis couldn't even begin to find the words to describe what he wanted to say. What kind of burden had he been placing on her by-...by trying to protect her... by trying to make her happy.... Had he been hurting her more because of his lies? Felis's bottom lip quivered again. Xavier's conclusion slowly hit a new realization into Felis' brain. His words.... they... they were true... And suddenly, Feliciano Rossi couldn't hold it in anymore despite all the barriers he was flanking up in his mind. It was weak to cry. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He had work to do and Rosa and Elayne and Ferd and Tim and Tom and Joel and Lance even...but then why... Why Arceus could he not stop those God damn tears from coming? "I-I-I know....." Feliciano Rossi answered back. sniffling then as the tears finally flowed freely. "I-I'm sorry....." What the hell was he sorry for this writer wished to know. However, it seemed only Felis would ever fully understand. [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]The sight was unbearable, yet Xavier was glad; the poor blond was finally opening that bottle of emotions Xavier just knew he had hiding under that passive wall. The apology, however, caught Xavier off guard. "There is absolutely nothing to apologize for." He said, quietly, eyes narrowed slightly. Oh, the poor man was a mess, and Xav could understand why... now it was time to prove his point. He reached forward to take Felis' hands, gently pulling him up and taking him into an embrace. His arms crossed around the blond's back and rubbed soothing circles into the muscle there. "Oii, there there..." He whispered. "Don't remember them for how they died, remember them for how they lived. I'm sure they wouldn't want to see you upset like this, ne." He cooed. And neither would Xavier, to be honest. If anything, he wanted to protect the man, yet also serve as a sort of councilor, of sorts. He couldn't exactly explain why he was so adamant about helping Felis, but something deep down just told him that it felt right, it was right... and he wasn't disagreeing. [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]At Xavier's answer that there was nothing to say sorry for, Felis tried and perpetually failed at fighting back the tears. Damn it. He clenched his jaw and pressed his teeth together mumbling a few more 'I'm sorry's. Being pulled up into the embrace was insanely comforting, yet at the same time, it somehow set him on edge causing more tears to fall. So many more emotions were spiraling that it made Felis's stomach hurt. "I'm sorry...." I'm so weak... "I'm sorry...."I wasn't there.... I'm sorry... I'm sorry.... I'm sorry all of you..... He hated Lance for running away... but... but he couldn't protect them either! It was Lance's fault! If he'd just stayed and taken that stupid title! No it... It was his fault for not helping... for not preparing in case he took over... for lying to Rosa.... for not being strong enough to just stick with his damn decisions.. for not being the one to harden his heart and do what is needed for Era. It was his fault Aki stopped talking to him. He bet Aki hated him.... he bet... everyone hated him for everything.....Damn it all this damn emotions. But for now, Xavier was there at least...... For all of this: for all his stress, confusion, and all hellish else, Felis was oddly coming to a bit of peace again. For now, his mind would settle down and relax again. Stress would be stress and scars would be scars, yet for now, he'd cover them up and bury them a bit. He'd let the faucet run too long again and knew he needed to relax it now..... "Thank you....thank you...." he sighed finally just relaxing into the hug of sorts. [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]The tears fell and Xavier let them, replying to Felis' small apologies with little chides of his own; "Stop it...", "It's okay...". His right hand rose to rub Felis' neck, entangling his hand in the hair there, while continuing to rub the man's back with his left. A content hum slipped past Xav's lips as his eyes partially closed... he liked this. Well, to be of use to someone... obviously not that Felis was so upset, but he knew the blond would feel better after. Growing up, Xavier had his mother to comfort him during hard times, and the red-head remembered how nice it felt to be held... Xav could only hope he was passing similar comfort onto Felis. When the 'sorrys' morphed into 'thank yous', Xav glanced over at Felis' face and smiled gently nuzzled his cheek into the others. "Feeling better, ne?" He chimed, eyes closing in a feline-like smile. [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]Calming down completely before slowly bringing up a hand to slide a stray tear away, Felis nodded against the nuzzling. "I....I didn't even know I had all that just...." Felis shook his head slowly and sighed out quietly. "But yah...a bit better....thank you" he hummed a little managing to smile a little before sighing out deep and slowly setting his forehead on Xavier's shoulder. "I-I-I'm sorry to ask this of you but....c-can you just.... please hold me...for just a bit longer." Feli shook a little trying to fight down his nerves again. No tears were shed any longer though. It was a... dry hug. [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]A small chuckle could be heard. "Everyone needs a good cry from time to time." He paused, listening as Felis requested to be held for a bit longer. Xavier's smile only grew wider. "Of course... and anytime. Don't be afraid to request one whenever ya need it." He nodded, shifting his gaze towards the chair. Hmmm. It'd probably be more comfortable for Felis there. Turning round, Xav slowly settled into the chair, taking the blond with him, shifting so they'd both fit nicely. He continued his ministrations and tipped his eyes up towards the ceiling again, before closing them and completely relaxing. Xav could stay like this for a long time... it was nice. This was nice. Everything was just nice, and settled into a comfortable silence. [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]Felis had moved easy enough and found himself relaxing just being held there. Things.... things... would be ok. For a while, Felis settled in a mid-ground between sleep and full awareness. The silence and the peace was just something he didn't get enough of if Felis ever stopped to realize this. However, after a while, Felis slowly opened one full eye again and found himself slowly sitting up. "Xavier... I ... have no idea where you get such kindness from...but... thank you for it." [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]Xavier himself had lulled into a doze, the sheer warmth and atmosphere being very similar to how he fell asleep with Wish every night, with him coiled around Xavier like a warm blanket... zz... yet when Felis began shifting, a brown eye opened slowly before the other followed suit, stifling a yawn and failing miserably. His kindness...? "Its just who I am~" He said a bit hazily, still blinking the lull of sleep from his eyes. "Besides its not hard to find it when the care is there." He added, letting his arms slide back to himself, and stretching his back. Oof! A vertebrae popped... that felt good. [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]A quiet smile set itself on Felis's face as he nodded his head before gently leaning in and giving Xavier a light kiss on the cheek. "Thanks," he hummed back a bit standing up fully now and slowly rolling his shoulders. Oh dear what time was it? Looking around for his clock, Felis began to shift around his person looking for a pocket watch. Finally pulling one out and looking at the time, Felis blinked. Well... that really hadn't been as long as he had thought it had been, heh. "You know what?" Felis started slowly turning around as he spoke. "I'll do my best to spread that kindness... and someday all of Era will be happy." He couldn't help but grin to himself a bit ta that. [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]The light kiss had been unexpected, but it was enough to confirm what that deep-down feeling was from earlier; ah yes, an affection. Xav knew he was drawn to Felis for some reason or another... he was a pretty man, a nice guy, and Xavier had finally come to terms with his sexuality, but he hadn't connected all the dots until just then. Ah. "No, thank you." He mused with a smile, gently touching the spot on his cheek with a chuckle. The time...? Eh, it felt like it had been forever to Xav, but he had almost dozed off and was still fairly groggy. However he was able to hear all of what Felis said and smiled broadly at him, clapping his hands a few times. "That's the spirit Feli." It really was the best outcome for the situation. Xavier rose to his own feet and tutted at the state of his hair, becoming absorbed in combing out the locks again. Such a hassle they were, but eh. For sexiness! TT [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]Upon turning back and seeing Xavier trying to straighten out his hair, Felis found himself laughing a little. "How can you stand long hair?" he asked after a moment turning his head to one side. "If I grow mine out any longer than it is now," Felis stopped a moment and pulled the end of a strand just to show the length of it. "It gets so unruly and just horrible." [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]Xav snorted and shrugged. "I didn't get it cut too often as a kid, too expensive and time consuming... and it just kind-of stuck." He replied, tugging a finger through the last small snarl, satisfied. "After I shot up a few feet the style appealed to me." He nodded. Ah, he had grown so fast... he could barely remember his childhood. He fell silent as he watched Felis fiddle with his own blond locks, chuckling a bit. "I like your hair..." He said softly, approaching the man as if inspecting said hair, before quickly snagging Felis' chin again and pressing a return kiss to his left cheek. "Fair is fair. ne." He winked, releasing the blond before ambling by as if nothing happened. "What time is it, hmm?" [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]Felis had been surprised by the 'return' kiss of sorts, yet he found himself smiling regardless. At the question, he laughed a little. "A bit a ways into the afternoon. Almost dinner time," he answered back nodding his head slowly. [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]Oh dear, was it really? Xavier hummed slightly at the mention of dinner. "I'll be sure to clear out by then." He said politely. He didn't want to intrude on their dinner, in all honesty he felt almost guilty for indulging in the cookies and hot chocolate... I mean sure they were offered, but it was only polite... 'Pah, manners can be so tricky...' [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]Felis blinked a moment. "Hey how about you say for dinner?" he asked after a moment. "Everyone in the castle tends to eat separately," she sighed at this rather dryly frowning a bit. Elayne was always in her room now a days, and the same could go for Lance. Tim and Tom came and went as butlers did, and it was still usually only Felis and Rosa at the table anyway..... "But I'd enjoy your company, and I'm sure Joel wouldn't mind fixing an extra plate." [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]Well that was a warm and fuzzy feeling if Xav ever had one, to be asked to stay for dinner. Then again, Xavier was always fairly easy to please, but that's besides the point. Although, he hadn't fathomed that everyone ate separately... in such a place like this, Xav expected the table to be full for most occasions. Perhaps it had been before the rebellion... Xav sighed mentally. It was good that he branched off from them... it had seemed like a good idea during his teen years, but Arceus knows what male hormones and adrenaline can do to a man. Now that he had grown up quite a bit, Xav's view on the lot had shifted quite a bit. He didn't miss them. "I'd love to, so long as Joel doesn't rap me on the noggin again." He mused, rubbing the spot in memory. Ah, this would be fun! He'd get to spend more time with Felis and perhaps entertain Rosa again. Speaking of which... "Did anyone teach Rosa how to dance?" He looked sideways at Felis. She had been a natural during their session in the rain! [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]A quiet laugh came from Felis at the image of Joel hitting Xavier over the head with his spoon. "He seems to either like people or dislike them," Felis answered back grinning a bit before shaking his head. At the question on Rosa, Felis blinked. "Probably for a bit... Our mother used to encourage everyone to learn to dance though I'm not sure if she ever got full training," Felis answered back frowning a bit that he wasn't sure. That was... odd... he should have been sure with something like that mmm.... [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]"Haa, it must be a mother thing then..." Xav mused, tapping his chin thoughtfully. "My mother showed me so many dances for the 'Physical Education' portion of my home-schooling. I used to think it was girly but I didn't argue much as a tike." He laughed at the memory, his gaze floating upwards in recollection before falling back onto Felis. "I had a small tengo with Rosa earlier and she was such a natural, I was wondering if anyone had taught her. Then again she could just be a quick learner." He rationalized. Ah yes, he had been a very passive kid for his mother and was subjected to all sorts of 'girly' things... dancing, singing, knitting even! But Xav hadn't argued... in fact, he was rather glad to know everything that he did now. It came in handy, that's for sure. [/scrolly]

[Jay]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc64/Heart-of-Thorns/felistable2.png);color:#8eaea5;][atrb=width,434][atrb=height,355][atrb=style,border:0 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(245),w(205),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:2px;margin-left:214px;)]Felis smiled to himself at Xavier's comment nodding his head slowly at the comment on Xavier's mother. Realizing that he had always viewed all mothers to be that way, Felis wondered what it would be like to have a different mother ._. Hm. at the comment on Rosa, Felis just beamed again. "She's a natural to a lot of things, it seems," he hummed a bit grinning ear to ear at this. If it was anything he found that he liked to boast and brag about, Felis found it was Rosa. Though Lance had moved back in... and Ferd had come home... it was just... well... Rosa'd just been there.... for the two years he'd been alone... and well.... "Do you --.... did you ever say you had any siblings?" Felis asked after a moment. For some reason... he just couldn't remember ever having asked Xavier if he did or not. [/scrolly]

[DJ Boomkitty]

[atrb=style,background-image:url(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v214/Ken-ji/Xavier.png);color:#000000;][atrb=width,450][atrb=height,330][atrb=style,border:1 black none,bTable][scrolly:h(220),w(220),sy,as(padding:4px;margin-top:30px;margin-left:180px;)]Siblings, hmm? "Not a single one." He shook his head, sighing somewhat. "Honestly the only family I really know are my mother and father, and even father was rarely ever home, haa. He's a workaholic." He smiled briefly. He... wished he could have gotten to know his father better. Perhaps one day he'd find the man and... have lunch, or something like that. Xav was doubtful though; like he mentioned, Jacob Stone was an avid worker whom found great enjoyment on making an honest living. A full forty hour work week and lots of overtime, that's how he rolled. With him separated from his mother, Xavier wondered how the woman would fend for herself... sure it was on good terms... maybe she had gotten back into breeding. Hmm. "Thats why I like kids so much, really. They're just so cute and give me that sibling-like feeling." Xav said, blinking and blushing slightly. "Arceus that made me sound so horribly creepy, didn't it?" He chuckled. Wonderful, Xavier. [/scrolly]